Izza's last day

It's been fun to get extra help from Izza. Hope she will now be happy with her new place and her pregnancy.
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

open as usual...

The centre is still running. My wish to downsize it is not really a good idea, but my wish to reduce the overhead is happening. Izza is leaving this month. In fact tomorrow is her last day. She's been helpful with the Multiplication and Division area.

Restructuring is not too difficult this time. the number of students is under 200 right now. Manju is going to take care of the marking and preparing of C and D. and Chelvi will be helping with teaching C & D. I will be in charge of the lowest to 2A and C & D. Fun!!!

The good news is, training of successors will start next week. So, we'll have extra help starting next week. I do hope from now on, it'll be smooth and in the end, a successful take-over.

Financial wise, it's been tough. too tough to think. BUT, next month is my trip to Siem Reap. I don't even know how that happened. And again, thanks to my good friend, I am also going for the National Conference and the South East Asia & Oceania Conference on the first weekend of June.

Tough it may be.....but life goes on. 

A plan was thought...

Jennifer and I had a long meeting at Alamanda Putrajaya yesterday. Things are clearer for us both now as how to dispose the centre in a smoother. Jennifer as usual saved the day by printing a step by step procedure we can look into.

We are preparing our profile and a few other things for our next meet up (Wednesday next week).

For now, I just want to chill in Tioman with Mimie and family + my diving friends. This will be my 2nd trip and my 6th dive. I am excited and not too nervous as to compared to the last dive.

I love Juha!!!

bouncing back....higher?

I have come to terms that there is not going to be any take over within these next 4 months. I have decided to do  some adjustments and willing to change a lot of things before I try to get a new successor again.

At first I was going to give it all up totally, but there's no big bucks coming in any time soon, so I just have to keep on going.

I badly need to stratergize and make sure I can reduce the overhead and increase income till June.

I have called for a meeting and need help from the Kumon office.

I think this is the best thing for me to do, while waiting for answers from Juha. 

Not Done Deal

Looks like I have to accept the fact that the deal of sales of my centre is off. The candidate, who was my school mate during high school, is now no where to be found. She hasn't replied to any messages and calls. I guess that is her way of saying "NO", but as a friend, i think that's a way to say "GET LOST!!!".

What am I to do right now?

A lot of plans playing through my mind .  To just close it without a successor and move on with my life.....

I am in the middle of planning to downsize my centre. Need to reduce overhead as soon as I can before my departure. The number of enrollment is already lower now.

I hope to be stronger from now on....

the tough gets going and going ....

Today was not any easier as to compared to yesterday. Early in the morning I was woken up by a BBM from a loyal staff warning me to be careful about 2 other staff. I've been feeling uneasy lately around them. I had a feeling it has to do with the Provident Fund Issue. I have been trying to pay, but we had no sufficient fund. I ended up being offered a loan from my staff. what an embarrassment!!! but i had to do it as to protect myself. Made payment, and banked in the salary and had a long chat with the two staff who have made be feel uneasy lately.

Showed them the evidence of my payment and told them to have some consideration about the whole issue as it's just tough for us.

I feel like like should just let go of my centre without a successor. Hoping for a real good windfall to come my way and I will start giving the 3 months notice.

I'm just tired and depressed and I want my life back. I want to live what is left of my life. Many times I don't feel like I have all that long to live. Don't really know why.

I hope life will change its direction real soon.

Amin.

PMS-ing!!!

What a challenging day it was emotionally. My head is spinning now and my body is weak. Due to caffeine from this morning I am still up.

Tomorrow is salary day for the staff. So, double ouch! For my pain.

Juha may be leaving me be for now. He did try to chat last night but I missed it as I was asleep.

Hope tomorrow is easier.

Dear Staff....

I hope that one day you will realize my struggle to make it work here. For the last few years I have more than suffered just to get that extra dime for myself. When I increased your salary years ago, our student count was at the highest. After that, we hit rock bottom and I never had the heart to cut your salary. However, due to that, I suffer and suffer.

It hurts me when you take working tiMe to do other things that hasn't got anything to do with your job.

I am going to step down and let someone more capable to head this place. I don't demand for respect, but by you not appreciating working and making the best out of it is too much for me in general. I can't run this place without you, but only if you can take pride in your job.


I truly can't wait for the time for me to say goodbye.

on a more positive note

The candidate to replace me as an instructor came on Monday and Tuesday for centre attachment. That shows more commitment. We spoke some more about it and more and more, I'm convinced that she is serious enough to do it. I have to keep on praying and hoping. I have to be happy that the end is near.

Juha text me when he was in the boat before he departed (Helsinki to Stockholm) and promised to get me a Stockholm t-shirt.

Jennifer and I bought a return ticket to Siem Reap for June travel. We will be joined by Teacher Tess and Arlene. I always enjoy a girly holiday. It's time for Angkor Wat. I also wish to book flight for umrah and travels to Europe in August.

I have a futsal team with great gals! My friends from BBGS. I feel happy when I'm with them.

Most of my little students (girls especially) still allow me to hug them. I love the bonding.

Blame it on PMS or the weather, I do feel extremely down today. This happens every month or every other month. This week, everyday, I would come up with issues that on normal days I can usually handle. On Monday, it was the short of fund for royalty payment. On Tuesday, it was over an email and whatsapp chat I had before lunch. On Wednesday, the shortpayment of royalty payment issue crept up. And today, everything is against me.

Should I go back for counseling help? I should consider it. I am facing a lot of changes this year and I must prepare myself for all kinds of weather.

Right now, I wish I have more money and less debt. Right now I am missing Juha and his company. Right now I just want to break away.

is the end near?

I absolutely have no idea. My successor went through the 2 preliminary interviews successfully. They're waiting for a candidate from Putra Jaya to go through hers and probably start training in March.

I hope everything will be smooth. At the moment I'm stressed up about the silence from the candidate.

I hope by next week, something is moving ...

Almost there.....

I feel things are almost at the end now. I know the whole process will take at least 4 to 5 months after the orientation and interview. They are trying to organize an orientation and interview by mid December.

I have 2 parties interested in being a successor and now busy going through the internship process at the centre.

I have not written here for a few weeks now. I felt like I had to take a long rest after what I would describe as a 'near death' experience. I got what I prayed for. I get to keep running my centre for a bit more.
They want me to find a successor. The definition of successor, they can't even give in detail.

 I can still accept what had happened and am learning a lot from this lesson of life.

J and I have decided to keep our dreams but will postpone things we had wanted to happen earlier.
My responsibilty for the children and their parents at the centre is at top priority now. J on top of my love interest, but I feel our relationship is strong enough to survive this.