I want to cut my hair!!!!!

I have kept  my hair for a few years now. Today is the first time after so long, I feel like cutting it all short again. Will see how I fee by end of this month.

I don't like loneliness

I have been suffering from this for years now. It's tough when as such, my character is not a loner. I like having people around me. I like being in contact with people all the time. Friends, I have so many. the closest sometimes look like they're suffocated, some seems to avoid, but it could only be my imagination and my feelings.

I'm always excited when there's happy news. I have to stay sober and calm next time. I must change. I think adults keep things to themselves and not always share it with their friends. Adults also have to always be selfish.

I sometimes feel so left out and so out of place. I know it's me, and it's not the people around me. Like always, there's only me to be blamed.

Now that I know how to blog from my phone, I think I can blog more. At the moment the blog is restricted to only me, until everything is settled at the centre.

I'm on sick leave today as I'm having cough and flu.

I'm testing my mobile upload

The journey continues

I have stopped writing in this blog cos I was in a terrible state of mind. Things have gotten better and I'm ready to report again.

I have finally decided to hand in the Letter of Intention to the head office. I should be looking into "freedom" latest by June this year.

A lot is in store. I met someone 2 years ago and we are finally seriously dating now and started to talk about our future life together. In my future life, i will have to embrace a life of a diplomat's wife.  First assignment for me: Helsinki, Finland. Who could have dreamed of that??? My very first pen-pal came from Finland. A place called Kausala. Been writing to her since I was 12. Little did I know that my "journey" as a gypsy will start in that very country.

i shall start preparing myself. When Mr Diplomat asked me what is the thing that I'd like to bring from Malaysia if I have to leave Malaysia. I took a moment and the first thing I could think of was...spices!!!!!!!!! yeah it's related to food!!!

That's it!!!

I'm tired now to even think about the running of my centre. I have had it enough. I have been suffering for years, and I thought by getting an investor, things would be easier. Things only got better during the first few months. I've been just paying and not making anymore.

I am doing what I'm doing out of passion, but how can one take it if at the end of the day, all one feels is pain. The pain of trying to keep things in order at the same time going in circles and cannot make ends meet.

I dropped the bomb to the head office early this week. I don't know how much my manager has spread the news.

Today one of my staff demanded a meeting with me tomorrow morning. If she needs to discuss about her pay rise....what is there to discuss? Even I'm not getting my salary and  have not been getting!

It is frustrating.

Syawal oh Syawal

Today is the last day of Syawal in the Muslim calendar. For me, the month of Syawal is a month to rekindle all the old friendship and also find new ones. It's also a month we see so much food and people gets so lavish in decorating their homes. I know this year was a happy one for me. Although I skipped so many open houses due to my reflux problem.

Today and tomorrow I will still have a big gathering for food, drinks and be merry!!!!